Dear Jersey Shore,

Congrats on getting your own set of video ecards.

Unfortunately, by the time anyone is actually able to use this Merry Christmas card, your 15 minutes of fame will be over.

Good riddance.

Love,

Tosh.0

So this is popular on the Internet… again…

I saw the image above was popular on Reddit earlier in the week.  After doing a bit of research, I discovered the pic is actually kind of old, so I refrained from posting it.  Then it popped up again on some other sites like YepYep and I figured, why they hell not.  It seems like something you guys would enjoy.

There's a site called TinEye that is a reverse image search, allowing you to see where else an image has appeared on the web.  Reverse searching this image returns 78 results, which is a lot by TinEye standards.

You can find evidence of its popularity dating all the way back to 2007… maybe even further.  It comes in all shapes and sizes, as an image macro, even as an avatar.

And here it is again.  Shooting to the top of Reddit and circling about the web.

What I've learned about the Internet…  People never get tired of seeing a mouse having sex with another dead mouse in a mouse trap.

Sick, world.  Sick.

Dude, that cat just RUINED your perfectly good game of ping-pong!

If a cat ran onto the court during a professional table tennis match, you wouldn't exclaim, "Hey!  It's ping-pong kitty!"  You'd say, "Hey!  Get that stupid f***ing cat outta here!"

But even more appalling is that is video is posted by The Orlando Sentinel on their YouTube page with the following description: "Miss Sadie of Orlando tries to get in on a game of ping-pong during a Thanksgiving family reunion. See more animal news at www.orlandosentinel.com/animal crazy."

"See more animal news"??  How the hell is this "animal news"?  How is this "NEWS"??

Hey, lady, better get this in to "Funniest Videos" quick before the whole world has burned in the apocalypse, which was inadvertently started by The Orlando Sentinel.

[via BuzzFeed]

Don't you love it when international puff pieces go viral on the web?  It's always so interesting to find out that in other countries cats ride the bus before being run over by a car, or that somewhere in the world there is a man with balls the size of beanbag chairs.

I don't speak whatever language the above video is in, but allow me to provide a loose translation nonetheless:

Reporter: Shane Brainhart is the laughing stock of his small depressing town where genocide is overlooked by local media outlets so that we may spend more time covering stories about small cars.

Shane: "My car is about 5 feet wide and my garage is barely even 5 feet wide, and ever since I was caught stalking young boys from inside my small car, I am no longer allowed to park on the street.  So I installed this board here, which is as hard as my genitalia when I look at a young boy, to help squeeze my car in the garage.  It is as tight as a young boy's sculpted body.  Now watch."

Reporter: Shane squeezes the car into his small garage as if to attempt to prove his life has meaning.

Shane: "I put the car in neutral, you see, and can use this door to slide on inside my house.  Voila.  You think someone with talents like this would have at least one friend or a relative who would call or even visit on occasion."

Reporter: Why not just end your life, which is obviously miserable?

Shane: "I like to think of my car as an affront to God.  That bastard wants to make my life a living hell and I say to him, I will persevere for no reason other than spite."

Featuring some of the latest Twitter and Facebook comments about Tosh.0.

First, Nicole, I want to thank you so much for taking the time to post on the Tosh.0 Facebook account wall not once, but twice!  We're so excited you're such a big fan!

To answer your question, Nicole, you can see the Tosh.0 coconut chopping video here.  (Unless you mean the salvia challenge video that also involved coconut chopping, which is here.)

But I gotta warn you, Nicole, if you're going to watch it again, be careful!  I don't want you to pee yourself again, Nicole.  That could be embarrassing for you.  To pee yourself a second time.

As for your second question: "Who thinks I would message Tosh.0?"

Well, I do.  With two message in two days, you are obviously one of our biggest fans!  I'm sure you will be one of the first to tune in for this week's episode!

Catch an all new episode of Tosh.0 on Wednesday, January 27th at 10:30pm / 9:30c on Comedy Central!

When I read "The Best golf shot ever – L@@K," I was quite obviously psyched.  How could I not want to see the best golf shot ever?

Which is why this video left me so conflicted…

Yes, what happens is cool, but it's not the "best golf shot ever."  The guy who hits the ball doesn't even know what happened.

If anything, this video should be called "The Best tossing of a golf ball towards a guy who is swinging a golf club ever – L@@K."

Pull your sh*t together, guy who titled this video!!!  This is why you lost your job at HBO and are greenlighting kid's prank videos!

[via UniqueDaily]

Here's some dorky guide to hacking something or other, but hold the internet phone. Before you put together a video that 28,000 people are going to see, you'd think you'd make sure all of your browser windows are closed. Unless, of course, you're trolling for a reaction.

What's "trolling," you ask? Well, on the internet, it's purposely doing something to elicit negative reactions from people. Like my brother did the first ten years of his life.

So sure, it's kind of funny… the guy's looking at bizarre porn. We get it. But don't give him the attention he wants! It will only make him stronger. Just ask this troll:

I'm not sure who created this image, but it sure does a convincing job of showing how well Pedobear fits in with the rest of the Vancouver Olympic mascots.

Coincidence?  I don't think so.

I've never really liked the Winter Olympics, and now I know why…

Apparently, the Winter Olympics supports molesting children.  Who knew?

Plus international hockey is just kind of lame.

[via F*ck Yeah Slightly Amusing]

I love Misery Bear.

The first time I watched, I was like, Eh, that's kind of slow or whatever. But after watching it a second time I realized…

This bear is sooo f'ing miserable.

How can you not love a bear that tweets: "going to get drunk now"?  Or drinks Jack Daniel's to do his laundry?

If Misery Bear doesn't simultaneously ruin and make your day, you just don't have enough compassion in your life for alcoholic teddy bears.

Cornell's Pi Phi sorority made quite a stir on the Internet this week when their rush dress code was "leaked" to the Internet.  (I put the term "leak" in parenthesis because I typically reserve the term "leak" for the dissemination of important information.  We'll make an exception here.)

Apparently, the Pi Phi rush chair is very particular about what prospective members should and should not be wearing.  And I don't blame her!  If I was looking for perspective bloggers to join my Greek blogging organization, I'd have similarly strict rules.

Here's what some of my dress code would look like:

• Bottoms:
  • Yes:
    • Pants — It can be very tempting when surfing the Internet all day to not wear any pants: aka, make sure you have some pants on.  This is an office for god's sakes.
  • No:
    • Boxers
    • Tighty-whities
    • No pants
• Tops:
  • Yes:
    • Casual Jackets (if you want to think like Tosh, you have to look like Tosh)
    • Ironic T-shirt: Preferably with a "tech" reference
    • "Hooded Sweatshirts" are appropriate if you can prove you didn't sleep the night before: aka, you were partying all night with other hipsters
  • No:
    • Cardigans: So last year.
    • Team Sports Apparel (unless you are being IRONIC)
    • Button-down Shirts.  Ugh.  You don't believe in corporate America people.
• Shoes:
  • Yes:
    • Flip-flops
    • Barefoot: Yes please!  I love it when you stick it to the man
  • No:
    • Anything Fancy: You are poor, so unless you can prove you got an amazing thrift store deal on those Ferragamo, don't even try.  Don't mess with me.
    • "F*ck-Me-Pumps"

Sweet!  Want to pledge the blogger society?!