Forbes released their annual list of "The World's Billionaires" yesterday and — surprise, surprise — I wasn't on it. I blame Comedy Central denying my request for a $1 billion raise. …which I deserve.
There is a new man atop the list, and oddly enough, he is from Mexico: Carlos Slim Helu. Obvious, making a Mexican joke would be too easy, so I'm not even going to bother saying something like "That's a lot of hours of gardening" or "Can you imagine how much time he spent out front of the Home Depot?" because that would be racist and wrong. I'm not going to risk my reputation and stoop that low.
With Carlos on top, Bill Gates is now #2. Thus proving my theory that he is a loser. Way to be broke, jerk! Looks like the Internet bubble finally burst!