"DIVRCED" was taken. And the DMV wouldn't allow her first choice: "IMABTCH".

[via juliasegel]

Yesterday the NY Post printed a front page headline regarding the defeat of the US soccer team that read: "This sport is stupid anyway". Welp, they said it. Opinions aside I totally agree.

Most Americans only care about soccer while we're playing in the World Cup and even then it's mainly just an excuse to drink early in the morning.

But the NY Post went too far with this headline. Let us make up our minds, news! Don't shove your views down our throats! Report the news and leave the judgement to the readers.

What do you think? Is soccer stupid anyway? Vote in the poll below.

Think you have a better caption for this image? Post your own joke about this picture in the comments. Then check back Friday at noon when we'll post our favorite!

Laugh all you want, but his hat is perfectly dry.

What is the biggest phenomenon on the Internet right now?

"Go to Google, type in 2204355 and click I’m feeling lucky.  Just do it."

Or since I am a nice guy, you can just click here.

But now everyone wants to know what the significance of the number 2204355 is.

Carly thinks that it's a coded recipe for fried chicken: "2 pieces of chicken, 20 ounces of oil, 43 grams of flour, fried at 55 degrees."

I think it's the number of brain cells I lost having to listen to Carly's answer.

What do you think it means?

Not since April 27th when I posted a video of an awesome old man dancing have we seen an old man this awesome dancing.

This octogenarian has moves. And rhythm. And he's so light on his feet! At one point he uses his new hips to do some sort of jumping jack move those 20 year-old posers could only dream of. Stand back, Pasha and Stefan, we're here to watch the old man get down.

Naturally, he ends with the splits. Damn! What a show!

The whole dance lasts over 3 minutes and he walks off like it aint no thang. I bet he's good in bed. Wait, what? Who wrote that? I meant to say I bet he would make a fun grandpa. You know, with all that energy and everything.

[via Videogum]

Watch as Daniel helps the cartwheeling goalie master the art of distraction in an all new Web Redemption this Wednesday at 10:30pm/9:30c on Comedy Central!

Want more redemption? You can check out all of our Web Redemptions right here on the blog as well as exclusive additional interview footage with our Extended Redemptions.

Yes, the image above is the entire original Star Wars movie (also referred to as "A New Hope" — primarily by jerks) in poorly-drawn, heavily-pixelated animated GIF form.

"Why, why do we need this?" you might find yourself asking repeatedly.  "Is my job really so horrible that I will stare at anything on my computer screen besides working?"

If you watched the entire thing, the answer to that question is probably, yes, your job is horrible.  Or you have too much time on your hands.

Either way, note how GIF Star Wars is still far superior to all of the prequels …and possibly Return of the Jedi.

[via Blame It On The Voices]

A lot of people are seeing this photo and saying, "For Ages 3+?"  That's not appropriate.

But I get it.  It's not for when your 3-year-old is using the sex toy.  That's just silly and gross.

It's for when your 3-year-old is filming you using the sex toy.  Duh!

[via The Daily What]

Power through! This day has nothing on you, badass.

Sure, it may hurt other people to be back at work after the weekend. But it doesn't hurt you. Because YOU. DON'T. FEEL. PAIN.

[via TBT]

I bet you're wondering what Daniel and the writers do all day long. Well… here it is!

Check out this Behind The Scenes clip of the staff playing an especially awkward round of Telephone.

What do you think the "Telephone" was? Leave your guess in the comments! Whoever guesses it correctly will receive – nah, doesn't matter. None of you will get it right. But take a shot anyway!