Last Monday, I asked for your suggestions to fix the oil leak in the Gulf.
This week, the well has stopped leaking. Coincidence? I think not. I'm almost positive BP read one of these amazing suggestions and used it to solve the crisis…
Harry Dixon-Cox suggested, "Duct Tape and WD-40."
Conner Frame thinks we should "put an oil rig over that damn leak."
Johan Hegg said, "make the World of Warcraft kid go down there and shove remotes in it."
jro wrote, "I'm sure Chuck Norris can do something about it."
John Schiro believes, "I'm pretty sure any solution will involve tongue-punching someone's fart-box."
Jay proclaimed, "Legalize marijuana!!!!! What was the question again?"
Blake The BA Alberger said, "Send John Mayer, he hates everything black."
Derek S suggested we plug the leak with "Demi Moore's pubic hair."
toshing off on your mom pointed out, "I think the Gulf just wanted to be on the new Comedy Central hit show TOSH.0…so it decided the only way to get on TOSH.0 was to PUKE!!"
William Acosta suggests, "Club Soda!"
dummyhead wrote, "Send Tosh down there to tell the leak some jokes. The oil will get so disgusted, it will turn around and flow right back into the earth. Problem solved."
Lisa Harley said, "Plug it up with all your old casual jackets."
Rogie suggested, "Rename the Gulf of Mexico, 'The western Black Sea.'"
Mike Van Amburgh offered, "We can throw my useless Finance MBA in there."
ml11jr said, "Two words, DUDE PILE."
And finally, Wes Danger Gore proclaimed, "Show me more titties!"
I'm not sure which of your suggestions was the one that BP used to save Mother Earth, but I'm sure you can all go ahead and bask in the glory of success.
The planet thanks you!