Featuring some of the latest Twitter and Facebook comments about Tosh.0.

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Reporter Tucker Barnes was giving a live hurricane update from Ocean City, Maryland this weekend while being unwittingly covered in raw sewage.

The station’s chief meteorologist told Barnes it was “organic matter…plankton mixed in with sand and salt.” But it was more likely a toxic mix of pollution and cyanobacteria, or raw sewage, pouring into the water during the storm.

This is almost as funny as the time the meteorologist told Barnes the pie he was eating was French silk when in fact it was dog shit.

[via Fox via The DW]

Planking is so last season. And coneing is bad for your health. So let's all join in on the new craze: Stocking!

I recreated a stock photo today and boy was it fun…

That stock photo is called "I Love My Job!".

And this stock photo is called "Frustrated At Work".

Mike actually isn't stocking. That's just what he did when I asked him to participate.

[Stocking Is The New Planking]

You think kidney stones are bad, try passing a kidney log.

Think you have a better caption for this image? Post your own joke about this picture in the comments. Then check back Friday at noon when we'll post our favorite!

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[photo: Harold Cunningham/Getty Images]

Let's check in on my hometown of Naples, Florida, shall we?

David Bustos, 26, got in an argument with his girlfriend last week. He left her home then came back while she was sleeping to shave her head with electric clippers.

"Deputies said there were several sections of braided hair lying on the victim’s bed."

Solid imagery, deputies.

What do you think is more upsetting? Her bald spot or the fact that those clippers are definitely used on his junk?

"Haha! That's some shitty luck." —Guy who got hit by lightning twice

[via Hairpin]

We usually shy away from "science" videos on the blog, but one area of science I think we all can appreciate is the science of how little kids are stupid as shit.

Just so you know, most kids grow out of this cognitive stage by the age of 7…  The rest end up working on Wall Street.

[via Tastefully Offensive]

OMG!  This is the dumbest back-to-school sale ever.

Everyone knows when you get pregnant you don't go back to school…  You go straight to Hollywood!!

[via BuzzFeed]

"Is there a building shaking?"

"Yes, Ron. The one we're in."

I didn't watch the VMAs, primarily because I am old.  I spent last night listening to The Doobie Brothers' 1975 classic Stampede which is all the music a person needs in his lifetime.

However, the MTV Video Music Awards are popular on Twitter and Tumblr and everywhere else Beliebers dwell, so I thought I'd look over The Daily What's summary of the event and give you my summary of his summary…

Beyoncé is pregnant.  That seems like the only noteworthy thing from last night.

Jay-Z is 41 and it will be his first child.  This makes Jay-Z "the David Letterman of rappers."

He's got 99 problems but unplanned pregnancies ain't one.

Shrug.  That's all I got.  Thanks to The Daily What for watching the VMAs so I didn't have to.  If I missed anything else, just fill me in in the comments which I don't read.