"What we're doing here today is to try and understand the underlying roots of your alcohol and drug abuse. Think back to your childhood. Is there anything your dad use to do? Maybe steal your toys and play with them himself for hours on end?? Maybe he and his friends would go film a video about your Fisher-Price Power Wheels Barbie Jammin Jeep, laughing to themselves the entire time, while you were balled up in a corner crying??"