Bill Wisth has a problem. It's not his running tab at a seafood restaurant nor is it the fact that he weighs 350 pounds. Bill's issue is that a place claiming to be "all-you-can-eat" would have the nerve to cut him off after just 20 pieces of fish.

To demonstrate his displeasure, Bill has vowed to picket outside Chuck's each Sunday "until the restaurant rethinks what happened."

Not a bad place to be every weekend considering, "Well, they do have like some of the best pizza in town—if you like deep dish."

[via BWE]

Currently available: Wonderful scents like Riding Mower, First Down and Man Town.

No word yet on if or when they plan on releasing "Peaches 'n' Skeet," "Warm Mother's Queef" or "Man Ass."

Though if "Man Town" doesn't smell somewhat similar to "Man Ass," what could it smell like?

[via drinkyourjuice / buy here / context]

One man's romantic horseback ride is another man's horrible fucking job.

[via reddit]

These pants covered in all kinds of penises are available for both men and women here.

It's one thing to be dressed like a dick. But it's a whole other thing to be dressed in dicks. That's fashion at its highest.

[via IHC]

Not only can this bird dance, he also helped me score the best molly.

[via Tastefully Offensive]

You know, dude…  A magic "wand."  It's that thing you wish you had to make this embarrassing video disappear off YouTube.

[via Gawker]

This is what it sounds like when doves chwi.

[via Rats Off]

Everyone knows unlimited soup, salad and breadsticks tastes even better when they don't see you coming.

[via hurrisonfode]

Holy shit.  You're right.  I should put that in my calendar.

That'll keep the pirates away.

[via The Chive]

He is the 99 cent.

[via imgur]

The real trick would be getting his own kids to admit that he's their father.

[via SayOMG]

If you do, tell her to fucking shut up about the sparrow that sat on her head.

[via i-a-b]

"Follow your imagination, but don't forget to learn Photoshop."

[via reddit]

Now all they need is a kid who can play air bass and a kid who can shoot air heroin and they can start a Nirvana air tribute band.

[via Tastefully Offensive]

Last Thursday, we showed you "Driving Around In A Chinese Lay-Z-Boy" and asked you to give us a better title.

We picked five of our favorites and now it's your chance to vote on a winner.

Vote below! Then check back Thursday for the results and a new video.

Makes your kids' macaroni art tribute to Adam Yauch look like a pile of puke.

[via Gawker]

Because your Spanx are a little too slimming in that area.

[Buy them here via Dangerous Minds]

Hopefully you spent the second part of Mother's Day vomiting up breakfast with Mom and Daniel and filming it for an upcoming episode of Tosh.0.

Guitarist David Didonato is currently attempting to set a new world record. If he makes it past 24 hours and 18 minutes, he will officially have played the longest guitar solo ever.

Since David took the stage around 7 PM yesterday evening that means he's about to break the record very, very soon.

And when he's done, David is going to get the longest blow job ever from a groupie that doesn't realize he's asleep.

[via Gawker]

And Nick found Lauren to be incredibly good at blowing. Glass. Blowing glass. Which is weirdly a hobby that the two of them shared and they just really hit it off.

[via Break]

Being the President of Canada isn't as easy as you think.

Think you have a better caption for this image? Post your own joke about this picture in the comments. Then check back Friday at noon when we'll post our favorite!

And help us choose our favorite by liking the captions you think are best. We'll take your likes into consideration when making our pick.

On a mobile device? Go here.

[photo: Izismile]

Did you spend enough time with your mom to remember why you moved so far away?

[via IMNS]

Come on, lady, don't let your kid shit all over some homeless guy's living room.

[via The Clearly Dope]

Though he thinks I look funny when I eat egg drop soup with my fingers.

[via I Am Bored]