boy

He's had the soul patch since he was 9.

[via Izismile]

Totally. Some bitches just throw themselves over their shoulder like a sac of potatoes and NO MAN WANTS THAT.

[via Failblog]

Since you spend all day on the Tosh blog, here's what you're missing on the rest of the web:

• The best Lion King rap ever. Rafiki be smokin' that weed and shit.
• A Bad Lip Reading of The Walking Dead. Zombies say the darnest things!
• A hot teacher was banging a 10th grader and got caught because she acted like a 10th grader
• Here's footage of Reese Witherspoon's arrest. 'Murica.
• This little boy fighting a couch is pure gold. That'll teach it not to eat the remote!
• Bad girls bend at the waist. Regular girls do too, if we're being anatomically correct here.
• Guy thinks he has a runny nose for a year. NOPE YOUR BRAIN'S LEAKING.
• She takes pictures with every celebrity. Also, refuses to change hairstyles.
• 25 awkward moments in handshake history. Thank god I just wink at people.
• And let's check in on Amanda Bynes. Guys she's not crazy. That's just how she works out.

[photo via Daily of the Day]

Pantsless baby at the top of the key. Back to you, Mike.

[via Deadspin]

His sperm count may be low but his energy is THROUGH THE ROOF.

[via Poorly Dressed]

If this was created 40 years ago, that makes it okay to masturbate to now, right?

[via Izismile]

So with a flick of my magic blogging wand…

"Try all you want, Ma. This cruise sucks and I'll probably never smile again."

And don't forget to check out the other people who deserve fame!

[via Videogum]

Same thing happened to me last time I flew first class. I'd downed like six Jack and Cokes, but still.

[via Tastefully Offensive]

It's very similar to blowing one with Bubblicious. Doesn't taste as good though.

[via Izismile]

Sure, his house has a couch. BUT DOES IT HAVE A PIZZA HUT EXPRESS?

[via Izismile]