cat

It's a swimming cat. But knowing you, you're going to make this dirty.

So how about you DON'T, and instead just quietly watch a video of a swimming kitty cat? Some of us can do that, you know, without leaving nasty comments.

So try. For us.
And this cat.

[via Dlisted]

Charlie Schmidt's Keyboard Cat Fatso played music enjoyed by millions before passing away.

Everyone made a huge deal over Fatso. Fatso fans enjoyed her blog, wore t-shirts with her name on them, and made her Youtube videos some of the most popular of all time.

This is why Charlie Schmidt's new Keyboard Cat Bento kind of rubs me the wrong way. I want there to be just one keyboard-playing feline Internet phenomenon.

It's kind of like I how I only want there to be one Wilson brother. You know? The world needs just one semi-good looking, boyishly charming actor to come from that family.

And if Charlie Schmidt even tries to tell me there's a third Andrew Wilson-type secret brother cat who looks and sounds exactly like the other two, I will be very, very upset.

[via Urlesque]

We received over a thousand comments for our most recent Tosh.0 Caption Challenge.

After much deliberation, we picked the following caption from a comment left by johnny timber.

That's Cat Stevens? No wonder he sucked.

Thanks to everyone who submitted!  Check back Monday at 4 pm for another edition the Tosh.0 Caption Challenge where you'll once again have an opportunity to try to prove if you're funnier than Tosh.0!

And remember: To enter our next Tosh.0 Caption Challenge using your phone, and to sign up for alerts whenever the latest caption challenge begins, text TOSH to 44686. To cancel, text END to 44686.

Think you have a better caption for this image? Post your own joke about this picture in the comments. Then check back Friday at noon when we'll post our favorite!

The making of the next Lady GaGa record.

The second part of this video is filmed entirely from the cat's point of view and it ends with the cat reading his own poetry aloud. I couldn't get the video but here is a copy of the kitty's poem. Warning: This cat's got an attitude.

MEOW, Part II

You?re sharing this house with me, I?m a cat
You bought me at a pet shop in the city. Remember that?
I wasn?t born in a hospital
I didn?t come from your womb
I use my tongue, not a loofah, when it?s time to groom
My point is, Jill, I?m a f*cking cat
You think I want to pee in a toilet?
Why the f*ck would I want that?
I lounge around all day
I eat my meals from a can
And it doesn?t bother me one bit, Jill
Because I?m a cat, not a man
So show me my litterbox
And I?ll f*cking pee there
And you know what, Jill?
If you?re interested, I can share

[via Found Footage Fest]

This conversation looks very similar to when someone is trying to get me out of bed while I have a massive hangover.  I'm not a master of either Japanese or cat language, but I'm pretty sure based on this video that "Meow" is cat for "Shut the fuck up!"

But seriously, does this mean that cats can speak Japanese?  That would leave me very conflicted, because I love my cat, but if he's going to live in our country, I think he really should take the time to learn English.  It's just part of becoming a functioning member of society.

[via Neatorama]

…throw on some cheap sunglasses and get through the day, dude.

Your weekend was rough.  Everyone knows it.  Chill.  Don't let the man get you down!

[via juliasegal]

Uhg.  I was out pretty late last night and am still struggling to wake up as I type this.  The only difference between me and this cat is that the cat is slightly less hairy.

But no wonder that cat can't get out of bed.  This whole set up is degrading!  The little bed and chair, the fake bird cage: This cat knows he's being mocked, and I'm pretty sure he realizes the whole charade will end up on the Internet so everyone can laugh at him.

You'd have some pretty severe kitty depression yourself if you were nothing but a living joke.

Next vid in the series: Kitty suicide.  LOL.

[via Videogum]

Dude, that cat just RUINED your perfectly good game of ping-pong!

If a cat ran onto the court during a professional table tennis match, you wouldn't exclaim, "Hey!  It's ping-pong kitty!"  You'd say, "Hey!  Get that stupid f***ing cat outta here!"

But even more appalling is that is video is posted by The Orlando Sentinel on their YouTube page with the following description: "Miss Sadie of Orlando tries to get in on a game of ping-pong during a Thanksgiving family reunion. See more animal news at www.orlandosentinel.com/animal crazy."

"See more animal news"??  How the hell is this "animal news"?  How is this "NEWS"??

Hey, lady, better get this in to "Funniest Videos" quick before the whole world has burned in the apocalypse, which was inadvertently started by The Orlando Sentinel.

[via BuzzFeed]

I first saw the above imagery of a cat being carried up a flight of stairs by some sort of invisible, ghost-like being in GIF form yesterday.  I was intrigued, but embedding a GIF can be a pain my ass, so I figured I'd just let it slide.

This morning, a number of blogs have linked to the video version, so now, I share with you.

If you're wondering what this is, let me explain: It is a master amalgamation!  Someone has combined cat torture and human torture into one glorious 33 second clip.

Supposedly, this was what Artie Lange was watching moments before he stabbed himself nine times.  Can you blame him?