china

I'm Jewish but you don't see me dressing up as a bank. (Unless it's Purim of course.)

[via Izismile]

The Mushroom Sex Toy story was easily 2012's best news fail, winning by a landslide.

There's something about the fact that nobody thought, "Hey, that looks like a vagina."

Gets me every time.

Let's just get right into this. The leggy sexpot above is Liu Xianping, and he is a 72-year-old geriatric turned super model.

It all started when he tried on some pieces from his granddaughter's clothing company and everyone quickly realized that whoa, why the fuck isn't he the only model on our site.

Of course I assume he has no idea what's going on and still thinks he's at home eating mashed potatoes, but sales have quadrupled for Yuekou. And it's not like any of Tyra Banks' models ever know what's happening to them either.

[via NY Daily News]

For the past two years, scientists in China have been working to reintroduce a female panda and her baby into the wild. This process includes wearing costumes to ensure that their environment is without human interaction. Yep, this is happening.

"These fucking humans. How long do we play along?" -Pandas

[via Buzzfeed]

When this machine comes to America, I'm going to get dumped immediately.

[via Barstool]

Japan sells crabs in vending machines too- they just come with the underwear.

[via Barstool]

The only thing that would make it more relaxing would be if those toilets they're sitting on actually worked.

[via LiveLeak]

NOW EVERYBODY HAND OVER YOUR F***ING FLOATIES.

According to The Atlantic, women are wearing masks to protect themselves from sun exposure. Kind of makes the whole one-child law easier doesn't it? Unless you're into that kind of thing.. Bow chicka wow wow.

[via The Atlantic Wire, Izismile]

A Chinese news station reported on the finding of a strange, very rare mushroom. Jokes on them- it's actually a rubber vagina.

Let's count how many times they refer to it as "meaty."

[via Videogum]

Chinese university students who were evacuated during their graduation due to a fire took the opportunity to snap some celebratory photos.

The Daily Mail reports one student said, "It's too big of a coincidence to see the university on fire today, as it's also graduation day. The students are filled with love in seeing the school burn."

Alright, you win this round, China.  But America's not through.  This is the greatest country in the world.  We'll figure out ways to show how much we hate school that you've never even dreamed of.

No one hates education more than America.  No one!

[via Gawker]