cigarettes

What's awkward is she's only 50.

[via The Chive]

Lucky bitch! That guy is so hard to get ahold of.

If you'd like to read more from this writer, or if you're trying to figure out how the hell to tell your parents you're a hooker, look no further!

[via Jezebel]

This year's most popular Halloween costume: "The Inside of Larry The Cable Guy's Car."

[via Poorly Dressed]

The best part about manboobs is that they double as a murse.

[via The Chive]

Seems like a pretty great way to pick up chicks. Chicks with cars!

[via I am Bored]

It's a shame what happens to kids when they learn they live in Indonesia.

[via I Am Bored]

Well, at least he's down to just one pack a day.

[via IAB]

They actually keep their kid in that costume all year round.  It was the only way his wife could get him to remember to bring their son home from the bar.

He died at age 9.

It was the most adorable lung cancer ever.

[via The Clearly Dope]

That's a pretty sweet cake.  But before you get jealous, white people, I found a cake for you too…

Because if there's one thing a 52-year-old smoker needs, it's a shitload of sugar.

[via The Clearly Dope]