coffin

Spring break was crazy, bro.

[via The Chive]

Susan's last will and testament: "I want to fuck up everyone's commute."

[via Break]

Although next time I'll make sure the coffin is actually closed.

[via Uber Humor]

I hope there are strippers in heaven. Or at least a vending machine.

[via I Am Bored]

Part of the Midwest died that day, too.

[via Izismile]

Dead asleep.

[via FoD]

Here's the problem with death: After you die, you can no longer engage in sexual activity, so people can't tell if you're straight or gay.

Imagine this scenario: Hundreds of years from now, someone digs up your grave.  How will they be able to tell that you were gay?

"I engraved 'Here lies the body of a gay man' on my tombstone," you might say.  Ah, but what if your tombstone has been destroyed or gone missing?

"Well, I have a number of homosexual-themed tattoos," you may counter.  Ah, but as skin decomposes, tattoos will eventually disappear.

You fumble desperately, "Well, what if I was buried with the corpse of another man?" Well, I respond, what if you two were just really close friends?

This discussion underscores why any gay man or woman really should invest in a gay coffin.  That way future generations looking to disturb your holy burial site will always know the most important thing about you: that you were gay.

So, luckily, I bring all this up because there's a store in Germany that's got you covered.  Orange UK reports:

The caskets feature homoerotic artwork on the outside and come with a series of tastefully luxurious plush designer interiors.

Well, that sounds…  insane.  What day is April Fools' Day in Germany?

[via The Daily What]