coke

Weird, my party sweatshirt says Tylenol & Tuna Fish.

[via Izismile]

So Jack and Jill came back down the hill

And went to the movies instead

And there they saw a preview that made them wish they were dead

Adam Sandler made a film and the title was their name

It was even worse than the erection thing. You should have felt their shame

They needed something stronger, a quicker route to death

And that is the story of how Jack and Jill started taking meth

[via reddit]

Last Friday, we showed you "Camel Drinks a Coke" and asked you to give us a better title.

We picked five of our favorites and now it's your chance to vote on a winner.

Vote below! Then check back this Thursday for the results and a new video.

This video is called "Camel Drinks a Coke."  Not as good as the video "Camel Snorts Coke," but this one will have to suffice for now.  At least until I find a camel and my FlipCam.

Think you got a funnier name for this video? Let us know in the comments! Then check back on Tuesday at noon for the vote off!

The winner of Tuesday's Rename This Video Vote was Bruce Meyer with his caption "I've had it with these mother f***in penguins on this mother f***in plane!"  Ha!  I don't get it.  I've never seen that movie.  Congratulations, Bruce!

A little white line never hurt anyone.

Oh, that's not how the saying goes?

[via AFP]

Daaaaayum. That bar showed Lindsay Lohan!

Real quick though, who chose those fonts? There's like crazy, hardcore distressed block lettering and… Comic Sans! The vibe is very confusing.

Anyway. Who wants a Lindsay Lohan? This round's on me!

[via The Clearly Dope]

But honestly, how do you misspell Coca-Cola, one of the most recognizable brand names on the planet?

Apparently this store caters to Korean customers, so maybe they just wrote it the way they heard it?

Is that racist?

Whatever, I'll just get a Perpsi.

[via EPICponyz] more...

What does it take to get a spike in ratings these days? Well, if the numbers for Monday's episode of "Two and a Half Men" are any indication, it takes one hooker, one hotel room, and three lines of coke.

Thirteen million people tuned in this week to watch Charlie Sheen and friends ham it up for the laugh track. That's a 7% increase from before Sheen's incident.

Our publicity team is working like crazy today upon hearing the news. They're trying to get the Tosh.0 prostitute to meet Daniel in the Penthouse Suite at the Holiday Inn. Cocaine's on us.

[via Gawker]

There's no point in Charlie trying to talk his way out of this one. This is the kind of spot-on journalism that will hold up in court.

We know it wasn't an allergic reaction, Charlie. We saw you do coke! The Taiwanese animation cameras were on you like a teddy on a dick.

[via Gawker]

According to a totally legitimate and not at all fake source, Paris Hilton wanted to use the bathroom before talking to police because was trying to stash coke in her vagina.

"She knew it would be her only chance to hide the cocaine and avoid arrest."

So what. Big deal. If you recall, Paris thought that cocaine was gum. And who wouldn't hide their last pack of Trident in their no-no part?

If you keep gum out in the open, everyone else will see it and want a piece. And then all of a sudden you're the Spearmint Santa Claus and you're passing out strips to the whole room.