diy

How To Use An Inner Tube Romantically When You're On Your Own:

1) Flatten inner tube

2) Cut hole in it (size of Oreo)

3) Go to Marine Supply Office… Depot. Buy rubber hosing, put around the hole of the inner tube. It will look like Janice Dickinson's lips.

4) Find pleasure by yourself in a beautiful body of water (trees, birds chirping, doves honking)

5) Insert your pleasure body parts into the hole

6) Push and pull inner tube

7) Smile, act like nothing's happening

8) Send Christmas card to inner tube company.

[via Barstool]

Nothing says, "rich douchebag" like masturbating with oatmeal body cream.

[via Imgur]

Paper bowls: For when your personal life is as fucked as the environment.

[Via The Chive]

Turns out she was "born this way."

And by "this way," I mean lacking all sense of public decency.

[via I Am Bored]

How many guys in black shirts does it take to install a lighting fixture? Three! You forgot the guy who has to film the two of them completely messing it up. But why? What goes through his head when he decides to videotape his friends doing this? "Installing a lighting fixture! Better get this on tape. Something really breathtaking might happen."

Or, maybe it's a fake. Maybe this was an intentional shot at some slapstick. In which case, I can't believe we're still using the Buster Keaton ploys of the silent film days — in fact, we're still speeding up the clip. A hundred years of comedy development later and the only thing that makes this any funnier is the bandanna on Charlie Chaplin's head. Can't we get a little more cutting-edge? Then again, I was the one who opened this rant with a lightbulb joke.

Are they trying to attract delinquents? Compared to their old mailbox, I feel like that?d be even more spectacular to hit with a baseball bat.

[via There, I Fixed It]

This DIY porn kit will "bring some raunchy fun into your relationship" by helping you direct your own porn video. Everything you need is included. So, next time you ask your spouse to shoot a porn with you, "I'm no good at screenwriting" or "we don't have a clapboard" will be no excuse.

It's available on Overstock.com, which is surprising because that means someone else couldn't sell these things on the internet.

$25.99

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These hillbillies got bored with making snow jumps for their toboggans…

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