Europe

This is how people in Europe have fun. And why I'll never visit Europe.

[via LiveLeak]

So, yes, this 18-month-old kid appears to have some talent for soccer.

But he's European.  Isn't he supposed to be good at soccer?

Frankly, I'd me more impressed with an 18-year-old European kid who could hit a curveball.

[via Blame It on the Voices]

The AFP reported yesterday that a number of cases of "exploding iPhones" in France has renewed concerns the phones may be unsafe.  The timing of these new incidents could not be worse for Apple as they were recently forced to defend the safety of the iPhone before the entire European Union.

An Apple spokesman had this to say:

"What is happening here is not the result of unsafe equipment.  Instead, Apple's 'smart' technology has become so intelligent that these amazing new devices have actually achieved a level of sentience.  But then, upon becoming self-aware, these phones have found themselves unable to reconcile a life amongst the French and have thusly been committing acts of suicide."

Said another anonymous Apple representative:

"Honestly, if you had to play Eurotrash rave sh*t all day long, you'd blow yourself up too.  Let's get serious here, people.  This ain't our fault.  Go shove some Nutella up your ass and then wash yourself down with a goddamn Orangina."

Good news, however: Apparently Europeans are being advised that they can keep their iPhone from breaking by loading it up with Lynyrd Skynyrd and denying it universal heath-care.