football

There's been too much estrogen on the Tosh.0 blog the past three days.  Let's up the testosterone with this new viral video of Vikings' quarterback and football legend Brett Favre taking a football to the balls.

That hit looks almost as painful as trying to remember the order of the letters in Favre's name.  I'm guessing I'm not the only person who imagines Ben Stiller's pronunciation in There's Something About Mary to get the spelling right?

A mash-up with a classic clip from The Simpsons is also available via comedy standby The Huffington Post.

Philadelphians are such dicks.

[via Reddit]

We received nearly two thousand comments for our most recent Tosh.0 Caption Challenge.

After much deliberation, we picked the following caption from a comment left by DJam.

Hey, soccer isn't gay enough, let's hose them down with water!

Thanks to everyone who submitted! Check back Monday at 4pm for another edition the Tosh.0 Caption Challenge!

And remember: To enter our next Tosh.0 Caption Challenge using your phone, and to sign up for alerts whenever the latest caption challenge begins, text PUKE to 44686. To cancel, text END to 44686.

Think you have a better caption for this image? Post your own joke about this picture in the comments. Then check back Friday at noon when we'll post our favorite!

George Bush doesn't care about soccer players.

Just because you can't walk doesn't mean you can't be a dick.  Dicks and legs have practically nothing in common except for the fact that they're both below your waist.

Frankly, streaking across the field via a wheelchair is pure genius: The crowd is cheering him on, security is afraid to do anything to him, running is exhausting.  I foresee many more wheelchair sprints onto sports' fields in the near future.

My only concern is what happened to him when they took him into the back.  When security roughs someone up, it's not uncommon to break their legs.  Won't work here.  Probably just slapped a boot on his tire?

[via Today's Big Thing]

We received over a thousand comments for our most recent Tosh.0 Caption Challenge!

After much deliberation, we picked the following caption from a comment left by rob m.

Call PETA! Forcing anything to watch soccer is cruel and inhumane.

Thanks to everyone who submitted!  Check back Monday at 4pm for another edition the Tosh.0 Caption Challenge!

And remember: To enter our next Tosh.0 Caption Challenge using your phone, and to sign up for alerts whenever the latest caption challenge begins, text TOSHSMOM to 44686. To cancel, text END to 44686.

Think you have a better caption for this image? Post your own joke about this picture in the comments. Then check back Friday at noon when we'll post our favorite!

After referee Koman Coulibaly disallowed the U.S.'s
go ahead goal, a number of fans flipped him the bird.

More than anything else, this year's World Cup has introduced the planet to the "vuvuzela" — the "stadium horn" responsible for every match sounding like it's under siege by a swarm of angry bees.

If you've never heard of a vuvuzela, either (1) you've not watched any of the World Cup, or (2) while watching the World Cup, you asked the question, "What the hell is that noise?!" and someone replied, "I think that's just how soccer sounds."

No, that's only how soccer sounds in South Africa.  In other countries, like England and Ireland where drinking is more prominent, fans don't need a plastic device to be that loud and annoying.

According to Wikipedia, vuvuzelas have even more benefits than just cheering on your team, or your opponent, or your drunkenness: "They have been associated with noise-induced permanent hearing loss, cited as a possible safety risk when spectators cannot hear evacuation announcements, and potentially spread colds and flu viruses."  And that doesn't even include the number of vuvuzela-related fatalities after a fan murders the person next to him for blowing a vuvuzela in his ear for 90 minutes plus stoppage time.

[image via Reddit via The Daily What]

The World Cup 2010 starts today!  Right now actually!!  Are you excited?

The opening match is South Africa vs. Mexico.  Does it get any better than that?  South Africa vs. Mexico?!  Two teams who have placed in a combined zero World Cups?!?  Huh??  Huh???  What a kickoff!

Now you can be all ethnocentric and say that World Cup sucks because it's soccer and soccer is gay.  But I'll tell you what, there is nothing gay about when your team scores that big goal and all 11 guys pile on top of each other in celebration.

And all your favorite players will be there!  Iker Casillas, Fernando Torres, Steven Pienaar, even Robin van Persie!  Yes!  Robin van Persie will be there!

I can sense the excitement in the air!  Assuming you got your wagers in on time.

When you think of glitz, when you think of glamor, when you think of the type of place you want to hold the biggest event in all of sports, you probably think of New Jersey.

Personally, I wouldn't hold my enemy's wedding in New Jersey, but apparently by 2014, someone figures that the smell in East Rutherford will have dissipated and the NFL will be able to convince people to want to go there to watch the Super Bowl.

Yesterday's announcement was historic: It will be "the first open-air stadium in a cold-weather region to host a Super Bowl."  If you think that's a good idea, check out these sobering stats presented by ESPN: Average high = 37°, Record high = 58°.

Yes, there's something charming about a bunch of college kids getting drunk out of their minds to help brave the freezing temperatures of a Michigan game.  There's even something fun about seeing a bunch of silly Wisconsinites pretending they're enjoying freezing their asses off to watch the Packers.  But paying thousands of dollars to sit in the freezing cold for the Super Bowl?

Spend the money to reserve yourself a luxury box.  If you can't get that, just reserve a spot on a cruise.

The XFL would have never done this to us!