Tosh.0 Blog

This Girl's Goin' Places

Posted by: Sam Jarvis | February 21, 2014 at 2:00PM

How do you sell 8 billion Girl Scout Cookies? You stand outside of a marijuana dispensary. Duh.

I assume her message to the parents who are hating is: "Aw, your daughter sold 12 boxes? That's cute."

[via Huffington Post]

Phallic Foliage

Posted by: TK Kelly | December 3, 2013 at 5:00PM

Well if you didn't want this to happen you shouldn't have asked these two comedic geniuses to rake the leaves.

[via Imgur]

Tags: 

autumn

chores

fall

foliage

genius

leaves

penis

raking

yard

yardwork

Cloudy With A Chance Of The Poops

Posted by: Sam Jarvis | October 4, 2013 at 10:00AM

Despite only being in the first grade, this kid is smoking weed at a tenth grade level.

Happy National Taco Day!

[via Imgur]

Tags: 

genius

kid

rain

taco

wish

Move Over, Thomas Edison

Posted by: Matt Koff | February 5, 2013 at 11:00AM

It's like a baby bjorn for lonely fat people.

[via Acid Cow]

He's Also Going As A Genius

Posted by: Sam Jarvis | October 30, 2012 at 4:00PM

I'd make out with anyone who thinks I'm the hottest one at a party.

As the great and powerful Daniel Tosh once said, "There isn't a girl in here that wouldn't like to go home tonight with a blue ribbon on."

[via Failblog]

Tags: 

chick

costume

Daniel Tosh

genius

girl

halloween

hottest

make out

party

quote