handshake

Since you spend all day on the Tosh blog, here's what you're missing on the rest of the web:

• The best Lion King rap ever. Rafiki be smokin' that weed and shit.
• A Bad Lip Reading of The Walking Dead. Zombies say the darnest things!
• A hot teacher was banging a 10th grader and got caught because she acted like a 10th grader
• Here's footage of Reese Witherspoon's arrest. 'Murica.
• This little boy fighting a couch is pure gold. That'll teach it not to eat the remote!
• Bad girls bend at the waist. Regular girls do too, if we're being anatomically correct here.
• Guy thinks he has a runny nose for a year. NOPE YOUR BRAIN'S LEAKING.
• She takes pictures with every celebrity. Also, refuses to change hairstyles.
• 25 awkward moments in handshake history. Thank god I just wink at people.
• And let's check in on Amanda Bynes. Guys she's not crazy. That's just how she works out.

[photo via Daily of the Day]

"Oh, yeah, no, whatever, it's cool. I'll just go home and write about this in my diary for a few hours."

[via The Chive]

You have something on your face, Billy Payne. It's a little piece of dignity.

There, yeah. You got it.

[via FoD]

Today's lesson: Blind people can't see you when you offer to shake their hand.

But at least she did the right thing by laughing it off.  Because I don't know what's funnier, her stupidity or his blindness.  Both really hilarious, right?

[via Today's Big Thing]

I used to babysit for a 3 year-old that did this exact same thing every time a girl on the playground touched him. He would always wipe their cooties off on my shirt.

Then I would give him a squirt of hand sanitizer and a few Goldfish crackers and send him back out there to play with the other kids. And if he was good all afternoon, we'd have popsicles!

It's so easy being a kid. Life is just one big playground.

Make sure Georgey doesn't talk to Uncle Joe. He'll put bad words into his mouth.

Reddit urges viewers to "Forget the shot check out the handshake!!!"

Here's what I'm thinking: The shot is inherently more impressive, but for all we know he could have been taped attempting that shot hundreds of time.  He only got one chance to nail that handshake.  Handshake FTW!

What do you think?

This greeting one-ups the secret handshake as a way of ostracizing unpopular people:

If that guy is a politician, I believe he just lost a vote.

[via FAIL Blog]