how to guide

Katherine Heigl is a douchebag-magnet. In every formulaic film she does, she falls in love with one. That's her thing.

So Nerve.com went ahead and made a quick "no-fail guide to dating Hollywood's rom-com über-frau". It's easy. Just be an ass.

And in ninety minutes or less, you've got the gal.

I don't know why anyone would want to win over Katherine Heigl though. Eeek.

But what do I know? I'm a silly, naive girl. Is there a guide to winning Mel Gibson? He seems like a catch.

This is a how-to video on flirting from an "expert" at eHow.com. He's got some really great advice.

Specifically, he suggests telling a girl her eyes are like blueberries and then pretending to eat them. Also, talk about divorce. Those are his tips. And you should take his tips because he's a Social Dynamics instructor.

Based on his brilliant coaching I have created A Girl's Guide to Picking Up Dudes. In it, I recommend saying, "Wow. Your soul patch is like a Frosted Mini Wheat. Wait, can I actually? I'm kind of hungry. Can I…can I have?" And then you rip their facial hair off of their faces and eat it. But make sure you do it with a smile!!

Also in my book, which was inspired by this video, I recommend role play. I tell girls to imagine planning their future husband's funeral. It puts you in a situation that would take you years to get into in real life even though you just met this dude.

Guys love girls who immediately start talking about their future together. Trust me, I learned from an expert.

[via Best Week Ever]