images

Stalking people on Facebook is about to get a lot better. Eight times better to be precise.

No more squinting to make out tiny pictures.  Facebook announced they've started "rolling out support for print-quality, high-resolution photos."  The new format will allow images to be up to 8 times larger.

The implications are many.  Remember how you recently stopped crotch-stuffing?  Yeah, time to start riding that train again.

Women, those cute poses might be enough to make you look attractive with a mere 720 pixels, but at 2048 pixels you're going to need to focus on the two "makes" — makeup and make-ing sure you stay away from people with cameras.

That's right, thanks to the new and improved Facebook we can all revel in being the hideous trolls that we are.

[via Techland]

Mashable reports that photo sharing service Flickr crossed the 5 billion photo mark!

Want to take a guess what the 5 billionth photo was?

I'm gonna go with "some kinda bullshit" …and then look above and that's the photo and I'm right.

Basically, Flickr is like having to sit through all the boring photos my girlfriend took while in South America times five.  And though you have to commend them for the sheer volume of photos they've come to host on their site, at some point you have to sit down and think, we're using energy to store all of this?

I mean, even with traditional photos eventually you cleaned out your basement or set your house on fire to collect insurance money or something.  With "users upload[ing] more than 3,000 images to the site every minute," the real accomplishment would be getting back under 5 billion.

I vote we start by deleting the 5 billionth image.  There's already plenty of images of that crazy building online.

This "History of Art" image has been making its way around the Internet today.  Why?  I have no idea.  According to some random comments, it's a T shirt design from the 1990s (which I can neither confirm nor deny).

Regardless of how old it is though, it's about time someone pointed out that it has a glaring flaw.

Each of the smiley faces is drawn in the style of the artist, except for Van Gogh which is just a representation of Van Gogh.  Van Gogh is not known for drawing realistic depictions of himself; he's known for his thick brush strokes and vivid colors.

Way to drop the ball terrible '90s T shirt design that is seeing new life on the Internet!

And congratulations to me for correcting some anonymous idiot that no one cares about.  My sense of superiority is alarmingly high.  My sense of accomplishment, however, is pathetically low.

[via The Daily What]

If you Google image search "the Internet", this is the result,

I think it's very important that everyone knows that.

[via Google images]

Here's a potential Jeopardy prompt for you:

This traditionally-minded TV game show played with fire by using the website 4chan.org in a clue during a recent episode.

Um, what is "Jeopardy," Alex?

You're right!

However, what's not right is Jeopardy's assertion that 4chan is "known" for posting "images."  ("Images" was the correct answer for those of you who were wondering.)

The prompt is really vague.  Here are other answers I personally would have accepted:

• What are "Lolcats"?
• What are "Advice Dogs"?
• What are "photos of their penises"?
• What are "photos of other people's penises"?
• What are "photos of other people's penises that have been mutilated"?
• What are "Simpsons' screengrabs"?

You get the point.  There are so many wonderful things that 4chan is known for other than just "images."

[via Reddit]

Bored Panda recently posted an article on "25 Incredible Photos Made Without Photoshop."

They open with the following question: "Aren?t you tired of all those digitally modified photoshopped pictures?"

To which I must respond: Hell no.

In fact, let me raise another question: Has a dog ever been to the moon?

No.  But would I want to see a dog on the moon?

Hell yes.

Oh, and thanks to Photoshop, I can.

Check out the photo to the right.  It's a mutha-f"in' dog on the mutha-f'in' moon!

What do you think of that?  You think it's totally awesome?  Well so do I.  And you know why it's able to be totally awesome… because of Photoshop.

The perspective photo at the top.  Lame.

Photoshop makes our fat celebrities bearable to look at and turns the primary source-based reality of history into a total freakin' mess.

Long live, Photoshop.

Mocking CSI on the web for all their ridiculous tech flaws has definitely gotten as much of a cult following as the show itself.

Now, you can give any image on the Internet the full CSI treatment… stupidity definitely included.

Just go to the CSI Image Enhancer main page, enter the two images you want (one to enhance from, the other to enhance to) and then, and this is the fun part, type on your keyboard furiously like those idiots on that CSI TV show.  The app does the rest.

Here is one of the site's examples if you are too lazy to choose your own photos.  (Trust me, you're too lazy.)

Is this lame?  Yes, it totally is.  But rest assured, it's not as lame as the show CSI.  Everyone knows CSI Miami is 1000x better!

[via Neatorama]

Since introducing it to the world earlier this year, Imgur has quickly become one of the more popular image hosting sites on the web averaging over 4 million image views a day.  Any viral pic worth its salt will end up featured in the Imgur galleries.

Yesterday, the creator of Imgur, Alan Schaaf, did an impromptu AMA (ask me anything) session on Reddit and I gotta tell you, it's surprisingly interesting.

Schaaf is a student at Ohio University and runs the site between classes.  In a telling sign of the irony of the Internet age, when asked what class he was currently in, Schaaf replied, "Intro to Web Design. LOL"

Yeah, Alan, you're in college: You can get away with cutting classes now, buddy!

A number of Redditors ask techie type questions (as one would expect) but some of the simple schematics of running a site that gets thousands of images uploaded a day are interesting, like how does he handle abusive content?  Answer: He has to spend about two hours a month making sure the site's clean.  (Which I think is the amount of time any average college student spends looking at hardcore porn.)

Another noteworthy query: "What is the most disturbing image you have seen uploaded to your site?"

The response: "A penis that was split in half. No one should have to see that…it was worse than anything I've ever seen."  (So now all you sickos can go look for it.)

Believe it or not though, Alan isn't doing so hot with the ladies.  Responding to the question, "Do you realize how awesome you are?" he replied, "Tell that to some ladies, they don't seem to realize :)"

Someone go date Imgur guy!  He's hawt!!

Actually, I have no proof to back this up.  But he seems nice.  (Apparently, I am turning into my mother.)

Regardless, go check out the session on Reddit.

But be kind to Imgur guy.  As Reddit user "mikebeer" states, "I'm sure he's thrilled to be in the same category as Tila Tequila and Tron Guy…"

Ah, the joys of being "Internet famous."

Look, I realize images on the web get passed around worse than the filthiest of whores at the seediest of parties in all of Ohio State University.

However, I'm sick of blogs adding their logo or URL address into an image like some tramp stamp announcing how hot they are.  Just because you crop out "failblog.org" only to superimpose "EpicFail.com" in a different corner doesn't mean I haven't seen the same image on a thousand other sites before you got your grubby little hands on it.

The Internet is becoming like some terrible acid trip: Every time I turn around I'm seeing the same faces everywhere!

"Wait, isn't that the same family from Awkward Family Photos?   But now they're here at Don'tJudgeMyHair.com.  How can they be two places at once?!  I'm losing it, dude!!"

Slow down, people!  Pretty soon we're going to use up all the images in the entire tubes of the interwebs and then we'll have nothing left to lol about!!!