instructional videos

I just want to point out that I am white, and I don't have a huge thing for asses, and I can still watch this video.  So all that you really need to do is practice.  People underestimate the amount of practice being an ass man takes.  Um, they feel like they should love asses naturally, and if they don't, then it's just not for them.  But I think that everyone, if they practice enough, can enjoy staring at a woman's bouncing ass.  So, work at it.  You might be surprised at how long it took for most men to get this.

[via Blame It on the Voices]

These guys are nothin'.  You should meet the guy who can do pumpkin pie calls.

[via Everything Is Terrible]

The second part of this video is filmed entirely from the cat's point of view and it ends with the cat reading his own poetry aloud. I couldn't get the video but here is a copy of the kitty's poem. Warning: This cat's got an attitude.

MEOW, Part II

You?re sharing this house with me, I?m a cat
You bought me at a pet shop in the city. Remember that?
I wasn?t born in a hospital
I didn?t come from your womb
I use my tongue, not a loofah, when it?s time to groom
My point is, Jill, I?m a f*cking cat
You think I want to pee in a toilet?
Why the f*ck would I want that?
I lounge around all day
I eat my meals from a can
And it doesn?t bother me one bit, Jill
Because I?m a cat, not a man
So show me my litterbox
And I?ll f*cking pee there
And you know what, Jill?
If you?re interested, I can share

[via Found Footage Fest]