KFC

The only thing sadder than using a KFC bucket as a lamp shade, is the realization that somebody ate their chicken in the dark first.

[via BuzzFeed]

The first week of school is all about figuring out who you're gonna sit next to for the rest of the year.

[via Imgur]

It was this or driving straight into the kitchen of a Marie Callendar's.

[via reddit]

Basically if you eat this it will save you from gang violence. Because nobody fucks with crazy people.

Having a hard time believing this is real? The truth hurts.

[via Imgur]

You fucking tell me, human. You're the one with money and arms and legs and a car and the ability to drive and a sense of direction and the ability to read street signs and speak to order food. So you fucking tell me. Do you want KFC? Because I sure as hell do but it's not like I can do much more than stare at the TV and then back at you to get my point across.

I mean, meow. (That's a yes.)

[via The Clearly Dope]

"There are those that look at cakes the way they are, and ask why? I dream of cakes that never were, and ask why not?" – This Guy

[via The Clearly Dope]

After two years of prison food, Tremayne Durham agreed to admit his guilt in exchange for coleslaw, potatoes, and a bucket of fried chicken.

I would have held out for a Double Down but that's just me.

[via Eat Liver]

That was me, moments before trying the new, and much maligned, KFC Double Down Sandwich.  (Ironically, "So meaty, there's no room for the bun!" is also my personal motto.)

Having completed my rigorous daily schedule of 5 blog posts well before 1pm, I figured that left me plenty of time to venture down to the KFC at Penn Station in New York City to try the sandwich the Internet had been buzzing about.

The AV Club declared, "Each bite became a grueling endurance test, as the cheese and grease began to override the chicken breasts, and the sandwich grew more revolting-looking with each bite."  That was, I would say, an average review.

Whatever.

People want to prance around, holier-than-thou, like they've never eaten fucking chicken breast, cheese and bacon before.  The only real epiphany here is that KFC has removed the bun.  How does removing an ingredient make something gross??  Typically, not having a bun makes something classier.  It's the difference between having a steak for dinner or a steak sandwich.  Sandwiches ain't classy.

If you've ever eaten a chicken sandwich from any fast food restaurant on planet Earth, you've probably eaten something that is as gross, or as un-gross if that is your opinion of fast food, than the Double Down.  You can pretend you don't eat fast food all you want, but if you're the kind of person who is even willing to try the Double Down, you obviously eat fast food, and if you eat fast food, you've eaten shit grosser than this.

So I ate the Double Down.  It tasted like two perfectly normal chicken patties with some typically terrible fast food cheese and bacon between them.  I don't see how it's that far removed from KFC's lazy attempt at a cordon bleu.

Was it awesome?  Of course not.  Was it terrible?  Meh.  It's KFC.  What do you expect?!  Seriously?  What would you expect this "sandwich" to taste like.

Am I sick of hearing about it?  Well, that is a resounding yes.

And do I feel guilty throwing down a ridiculous $5.99 to get caught up in this madness?  I will never escape my shame…

The Consumerist is breaking important news in the world of eating.  Bread is bullshit and buns are for idiots.  Real foodies only want meat, cheese and bacon.

People seem to be offended by this — saying it'll make you fat or looks gross — but I don't see anything wrong with it.  What's offensive is that KFC expects people to eat it with their hands.

If this was on a plate, they'd give you silverware and serve it with a side of Brussels sprouts and call it chicken cordon bleu and no one would care.

What's gross is stuffing a perfectly good meal in a paper bag.  Give me some fine china and class this crap up, jerks!

[via Reddit]

Sometimes, a fast food joint will close down, leaving a pathetic piece of suburban architecture behind. And though you could buy a whole city block for the price of a Big Mac in most of middle-America, some small business owners can only afford one of these franchise relics. Not Fooling Anybodyis a site dedicated to documenting these remains. Here are a few highlights:

Don't let the motif fool you — this is no longer a genuine KFC. However, that is a genuine strip mall dry cleaner, a genuine fourth-generation Honda accord and a genuine Patrick Henry bust. Monte Vista Liquors might seem a little bleakly ordinary due to its KFC past, but it did inherit a huge liquor store asset: the drive-thru window.

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