Tosh.0 Blog

I Gets Tattoo

Posted by: TK Kelly | June 12, 2013 at 3:00PM

It's times like this when you with the Microsoft Word paperclip showed up at tattoo parlors.

[via FAIL Blog]

Marketing Fail

Posted by: Joselyn Hughes | November 17, 2009 at 2:01PM

It's another planned sporadic Windows 7 celebration!  Wow, seems so natural and unrehearsed.  Let's look at the description by the person who "caught" this and posted it:

The Blackeyed Peas compel the employees at the Microsoft Store in Mission Viejo, California to break out in dance, let their hair down and have some fun. This is an amazing store, the employees seem really excited and engaged, almost happy to be at work. My favorite parts are when people walking in the mall come inside the store, join in the dancing and have some fun. The amazing thing is that people are in the store for hours, they love interacting with the software and learning about new technology.

Sure, sounds just as natural as your Windows 7 party video.   People really ARE excited about computer operating systems!

[via Engadget]

Microsoft Never Understood Marketing

Posted by: Joselyn Hughes | October 8, 2009 at 2:00PM

Here I was, thinking that Microsoft's attempt at a viral video marketing campaign for Windows 7 a couple weeks ago was the worst thing I'd ever seen, but ah! Not true!

THIS is Microsoft's worst marketing video I've ever seen.

Someone actually wrote this! If you don't feel like listening to crappy mid-90's sitcom dialogue combined with a Windows '95 tutorial for ten minutes, here's my favorite snippet:

Lady: Now let's load up the task bar; I'll show you what it does.
Jennifer Aniston: Task bar? Is that anything like a Snicker's bar? Does that have nougat?
(beat)
Matthew Perry: What is nougat, does anybody know that?
[insert Seinfeld bass riff]

Matthew Perry is really at the height of his Chandler-ness in this video– it's intense.

And Jennifer Aniston too!? I'm so excited I'm going to go get "The Rachel" and avoid buying anything Microsoft makes for the rest of my life.

Thanks Bill Gates!

[via Reddit]

SouljaSmith by Microsoft

Posted by: Chris Lesinski | September 30, 2009 at 1:00PM

Money can't buy happiness

Earlier in the year, Microsoft came out with a program called SongSmith which automatically adds background music to human singing. So, a solo singer in the elementary school play needn’t have the lame-o accompaniment of the music teacher on a piano anymore. Computers can automate that menial task with MIDI sounds instead! A stable version of the software came out this month.

Screw auto-tuning your voice – just auto-tune the music in the background to match whatever horrible pitch you happen to spew out. I can’t wait till the day I see text at the beginning of a music video that credits Microsoft as a producer.

I was recently turned on to SongSmith because it made this Soulja Boy song tolerable. Another truly staggering application –- SongSmith can take great music and make it even better. Check out a few more mash-ups after the jump.

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Microsoft Wants to Use New Ad CAPTCHAs

Posted by: Joselyn Hughes | August 27, 2009 at 6:00PM

_captcha-

Ever wonder why, for about 30 seconds when you were typing in a CAPTCHA — while signing up for that e-mail account, posting a comment or whatever — you weren't being bombarded with advertisements?  

You probably didn't wonder because you were too busy trying to figure out what the CAPTCHA said, but that shouldn't be a problem anymore  if Microsoft has anything to say about it.

News this week says that Microsoft wants to come out with a new kind of CAPTCHA that serves ads rather than weird twisted words you can't read.  They'd  replace them with ad related images, slogans, and musical jingles about a product, so to pass through it, the user will have to enter that product's name.  I'm going to take a wild guess and say they'll be Microsoft based?

Personally, I have no problem with this.  I've sat in front of CAPTCHAs for hours trying to guess what the warped text says.  I'll be absolutely brainwashed by advertisements if I don't have to figure out what some made up word and number combo says before posting a link on Facebook to a video of a kid falling off a skateboard.  I will however, miss the unintentionally funny CAPTCHAs.

[via Maximum PC]

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