mother

Yes, it's almost here: Mother's Day. Are you tired of pandering to your poor old mom with gifts she'll actually like?Flowers? Gift cards? Jewelry? Snoozefest 5000! Why not get her a gift that says how you really feel? You know, like "Fuck you for putting me on this terrible planet," or "I hate student loans and I hate you, you old hag!"

That's why we've compiled a list of 10 awful Mother's Day presents that will make her cross her legs and yearn for a retroactive abortion. Gifts like "Bacon Candle" (above) and "Back Hair Shaver" (below.)

Click below for more truly terrible Mother's Day gift ideas!

Featuring some of the latest Twitter and Facebook comments about Tosh.0

Hey, she didn't ask to be Jewish.

Featuring some of the latest Twitter and Facebook comments about Tosh.0

Just be glad she's finally learning about her body.

Comes in larger sizes for when he hits 30.

[via Poorly Dressed]

A hundred mothers who dropped their daughters off in Red Wings jerseys are sobbing uncontrollably right now.

[via Failblog]

Featuring some of the latest Twitter and Facebook comments about Tosh.0.

Sorry, from now on we'll stick to factory-assembled sex toys.

He's also in the Large Scale Gardening Project Club but that shirt's lame.

[via I am Bored]

"We could paint the house a different color, change the locks, and who knows, maybe start having sex again?"

[via The Chive]

Anyone else bothered by how unbothered the kid looks?

[via Acid Cow]

I'm not positive, but this person MAY want to fuck their mother. Either way: Happy President's Day!

[via Break]