Wake Up, Man Baby
Posted: 05/14/13
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I have a lot of respect for mothers: It's not easy getting shitty Mother's Day cards from your stupid kids and having to think, "I gave birth to this dumbass!? I'm stuck with this idiot 'til he's 18??"
[via I Am Bored]

Wow, there really are websites for everyone. Over at the Yummy Mummy club, they're taking their own stabs at what the definition of "MILF" could possibly mean, despite the fact that the rest of the world knows exactly what it means.
The bad news is, mums, you're not doing so well. Here's their definition:
M: Modern
I: Inspired
L: Lifemaker
F: Freakin' multi-tasking babes
Yeah, nope, that's not it. Who else wants a stab at it? Lacey in Vancouver, WA? Okay, go!
M: Man
I: I
L: Look
F: Fly
Yep. Wrong again. Anyone else? What about Ann Convery from Thompson?
M: many
I: inspiring
L: lifelong
F: friends
Wrong again. Are these mothers guessing or are their children guessing for them? One more try. C'mon Hanan P. in New Glasgow, tell them what MILF means.
M: Muslim
I: Inspiring
L: Loving
F: Friend
Wow. You MILF's are stupid.
Here's an idea: why don't you use the internet the right way and search the millions of pages online that will not only tell you, but show you what a MILF is? Warning: may be much more inappropriate for your children than your website.
On that note, stay on your own page. We've got enough MILF's who know exactly what they are running around the internet.

Sorry, I meant birth. Birth. Live birth online.
A 23 year-old first time mother is planning on broadcasting her live birth over the internet, and in related news, I just puked.
Not only does this make me want to throw my computer into the ocean, but it makes me want to cry for humanity. Porn cams? I can deal. A live steam of squirrels? I can deal. Stephan Marbury? I can kind of deal.
But human birthing is a whole different subject.
To be polite, I will say it's a natural event that should happen in the privacy of the people experiencing it.
To be honest, it's just gross.
For whatever reason, millions of vaginas on the Internet I can handle. But one placenta and I'm outta here. What do you guys think, am I the only one!?
[via The Daily What]

It's one thing to post a passive aggressive note in the workplace, but having a sign made and posting it in the workplace is another level. I feel like my mother somehow had a part in this.
I would hope that if this sign were to be put on computers, the amount of single-themed tumblr blogs would sharply decrease, but that's shooting pretty high. But right now, the internet is winning. Every time I log on and surf reddit, I am destroying parts of my brain and so are you.
(Except for this blog, it makes you real smarter. Keep reading!)


But what if she's pregnant with the Michael Jackson reincarnate? That complicates things.
Please offer your own advice to Angela in the comments below.
[Question was deleted but here's Google's cache]
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