mp3s

The latest fear-mongering on the Internet is that the Internet can get you high.

Yeah, wishful thinking.

Supposedly, there are videos and MP3s that can be found online that use "binaural, or two-toned, technology to alter your brain waves and mental state."  Using music to alter your mental state: Isn't that the point of listening to music?  Why do you think Pink Floyd made Ummagumma?

But this music is different.  Neurosurgeons Parents without college degrees claim that listening to these mind-altering sounds can be a "gateway drug," leading kids to want to try other illicit substances.

Ah… no.  You know what makes kids want to try illegal drugs: When they see that Snoop Dogg has the kind of money to attempt to rent entire countries.  That's the kind of music we should be worried about.  When I was a kid, we didn't need "binaural" MP3s as a gateway drug; we had Cypress Hill's Black Sunday.  I wanna get high, so high, indeed.

As a parent, you should hope your kids are wasting 10 minutes at a time listening to "Gate of Hades."  That's 10 minutes less time they are spending over at the house of their cooler friend who can actually score weed.

[via Huffington Post]

This week's unclaimed domain:

WaterBoreding.com

.

You're watching Fox News (just pretend). It's five pundits rehashing old debates about rendition and Karl Rove. It's boring. It's really boring. You are being "water boreded."

That clever little witticism in dot com form is still up for grabs. We're just as surprised as you are.

Here are some potential uses for waterboreding.com:

• A blog about ways to distract yourself whilst engaging in the most monotonous and inhumane sport on the planet, swimming.
• A database of MP3s to pass the time while torturing someone 266 times.
• A review site about the world?s most interesting beverages.
• A Java game with no way of winning, where you just watch someone wakeboarding from the back of a boat.
• Or, just buy it and forward it to the Tosh.0 Blog!

Last week's Unclaimed Doman, runninglatte.com, was purchased by Vanessa Heckman in a matter of moments! So, act quickly! This post alone will probably give you enough backlinks for 5 or 6 hits.

[Image: dpurdy / CC BY-ND 2.0]