penis

"And I doth so love this particular dog I shalt mushroom stamp him!" — God

[via Izismile]

Sometimes it's like, 'Put some pants on, Ashley! We get it! You had a sex change.'

[via iab]

Don't say the Tosh.0 Blog never covers the 2012 elections.

Daily Show who??

[via The Daily What]

One child's arm is another man's tiny dick.

[via BIOTV]

Who invited Chris Brown to the snow ball fight?

[via The Chive]

EXTRA!  EXTRA!  READ ALL ABOUT IT!  BALD-HEADED PEOPLE LOOK LIKE GIANT WALKING PENISES!

[via The Clearly Dope]

Get your own pair here.

Mike claims he'd sleep with her. Because he "likes women who are trying to hide their penis from him".

I'd sleep with her too. Because I like men.

[YOOX, thanks joselyn]

On the bright side, a fake penis running down the back of your leg is better than real semen running down the back of your leg.

[via Poorly Dressed]

Wow, that's embarrassing. She's dreaming about cannons. What a weirdo!

[via IAB]

Well, for starters, 4 letters.

[via It Makes No Sense]