police

Since you spend all day on the Tosh blog, here's what you're missing on the rest of the web:

• 12 boob gifs. I just tried to grab my computer screen.
• Parakeets running in slow motion, which pairs nicely with almost any genre of music.
• Cow farts could one day fuel planes. In terms of cow parts, farts are really the only thing we DON'T use.
• A guy had an erection for 8 months. That's what you get for getting a dick implant.
• Dogs out the window will make you question every stress you have in life.
• Miley Cyrus has a grill now. She could barely talk before!
• Here's a guy dancing at an electronics expo, dancing pretty much how you'd expect from someone attending an electronics expo.
• Facebook has hashtags now. #ohyeahnothatsreallycoolwealllovehashtags.
• A couple married at Ikea. Their first, second, and third courses were all Swedish meatballs.
• An idiot called the police on his hooker because she wasn't hot enough. Wait not all hookers are hot?!
• And girls in towels, because I'm a sweetheart.

[still via I am Bored]

This is an exact reenactment of the raid on the Sandusky compound.

[via Izismile]

Bieber got busted driving his Ferrari like a god damn maniac again.

[via Izismile]

I can't wait until they realize it's stuffed.

[via Break]

So with a flick of my magic blogging wand…

"Also, is it okay if we merge into your lane?"

And don't forget to check out the other people who deserve fame!

[via Daily of the Day]

Since you spend all day on the Tosh blog, here's what you're missing on the rest of the web:

• A grown ass man got stuck in a high chair and had to call 911. PS his friends left him there.
• This clip from HBO's Real Sex is one of those WOW moments. I've played it ten times already.
• A drunk angry guy cut off his penis to get back at his girlfriend. Sound logic.
• Tobias Funke in The Shining. This scene still makes me want to pee my cutoffs.
• Girls in and around water is all kinds of sexy! Stay hydrated, kids.
• 'Follow me/Bring beer' sandals. I should say both of those things to potential suitors.
• Kim Kardashian's pregnant feet are- AHHHH.
• A Papa John's delivery guy was busted for delivering $40,000 worth of cocaine. Did he include the garlic sauce??
• Dharma eats spaghetti. Is the singular for spaghetti still spaghetti? She eats ONE spaghetti.
• Justin Bieber has 24 hours to claim his monkey, is definitely not going to.
• A dude rubbed his dick on some pepperoni in a grocery store because why not?
• Bonus Link: Mama June's portrait, which to be honest reminds me of Kim Kardashian's pregnant feet.

[photo via Gawker]

"What? Yeah I'll check his pulse in a sec lemme just get this picture LOL."

[via UberHumor]

"Now is someone gonna put donuts around these babies or what!?"

[via It Makes No Sense]

I'm guessing he had an unregistered Supersoaker.

[via Acid Cow]

"I turn the safety off to keep my prostate on its toes."

[via Imgur]