prostitute

First her mom named her Paisley. Then she entered her in beauty pageants. And now she's dressing her like a hooker.

We all like Pretty Woman. Richard Gere plus Julia Roberts' mouth is a great combination. But this clip from Toddlers & Tiaras is just disturbing. No three-year-old should be dressed like a prostitute. Even for Toddlers & Tiaras, this is bad. And that show has lower standards than a frat boy at closing time.

Big mistake, Paisley's mom. BIG. Huge.

[via Jezebel]

Also, the economy is like your mom — it's f***ed the entire country.

[via TDW]

Whoever created this animated GIF seems like a "glass half full" type of guy.

[via Not Safe for Human Consumption]

What does it take to get a spike in ratings these days? Well, if the numbers for Monday's episode of "Two and a Half Men" are any indication, it takes one hooker, one hotel room, and three lines of coke.

Thirteen million people tuned in this week to watch Charlie Sheen and friends ham it up for the laugh track. That's a 7% increase from before Sheen's incident.

Our publicity team is working like crazy today upon hearing the news. They're trying to get the Tosh.0 prostitute to meet Daniel in the Penthouse Suite at the Holiday Inn. Cocaine's on us.

[via Gawker]

Spanish prostitutes/8th grade hall monitors

[via Telegraph]

I'm going to text this number and see what it takes to get into the professional peeing business. Seems easy enough.

And I'm a big believer in trying to make money off things you do anyway for free. Like blogging, for example. I used to do it for fun and now it's my job.

Same thing goes for sex.

May as well make a few bucks off our hobbies. Right, ladies?

[via I-A-B]

It's awkward when another piece of meat is wearing the same outfit as you.

[via Pic Is Unrelated]