sleep

"Dude, if she hadn't of climbed up and slept on top of the refrigerator I think I totally would have had a chance with her."

Let's be honest, if this kind of behavior was socially acceptable, I'd be covered in a blanket hiding in a corner right now.

Thank you, dog, for making hating your life cool again.

[via journo-fascist profiteer]

Last Friday, we showed you "Snoring Seal" and asked you to give us a better title.

We picked five of our favorites and now it's your chance to vote on a winner.

Vote below! Then check back this Thursday for the results and a new video.

This video is called "Snoring Seal."  At least I hope to god that's a seal.

Think you got a funnier name for this video? Let us know in the comments! Then check back on Tuesday at noon for the vote off!

This week's Rename This Video Vote was once again neck and neck, this time between all five choices.  But a winner did emerge: It was Evan McGill with his title, "To be fair, the welfare office was closing in ten minutes."  It's funny because poor people ride the bus.  Congratulations, Evan!

The latest invention to make the rounds on the web: an alarm clock that gives you extra incentive to get up…  It shreds money if you continue to sleep.

What's next?  An alarm clock you strap to your balls and every minute you don't get up it clamps down harder on your balls…??

Filing patent now…

[via Laughing Squid]

According to the product site, OSTRICH offers a micro environment in which to take a warm and comfortable power nap at ease. Its soothing cave-like interior shelters and isolates our head and hands (mind, senses and body) for a few minutes, without needing to leave our desk.

Ah, yes. A cave pillow. I think this is basically what Ryan Reynolds gets stuck in in the movie Buried. I didn't see it because I'm claustrophobic and the previews made me hyperventilate. But I assume that his pillow, voiced by Sandra Bullock, held him hostage in what turned out to be a light-hearted comedy.

Anyway, sleepy desk jobbers. Suffocate yourself with a cave pillow today!

[via Geekologie]

Not all it's cracked up to be.

[via imgur]

She wouldn't give me her number so I just left her here so I can call her tomorrow.

APRIL FOOLS!  That's your mom!

[via EPICponyz]

Featuring some of the latest Twitter and Facebook comments about Tosh.0.

I hope you have a lot of episodes saved up on your DVR, Emily.

Otherwise, you're looking at no less than 21½ hours of sleep a day.  And on Saturdays you can plan on pretty much not getting up at all.

I'm not trying to be a dick.  I'm just telling you what's on the schedule.

Though on January 11th, you'll probably want to get up early and stake out the best position on your couch, lest you be stuck sitting on the floor at your big Tosh.0 Season 3 Premiere party.

You are having a Season 3 Premiere party, right??  I've already invited myself over.

Last Friday, we showed you "Cat Doesn't Want to go to School Today" and asked you to give us a better title.

We picked five of our favorites and now it's your chance to vote on a winner.

Vote below! Then check back this Friday for the results and a new video.