south africa

A Redditor took this photograph in South Africa.

It's a shame, really.  This guy had just gotten back on his feet after losing everything to Bernie Madoff.

[via The High Definite]

Did you see that big finish in the World Cup moments ago??

Apparently, the US was so pathetic, the refs gave us some extra time to try to win and it paid off.  Thanks, refs!  You guys have been so great to us over the course of this World Cup.  We really owe you our gratitude.

I'm just glad they made it through.  The case of red, white and blue vuvuzelas I ordered from South Africa still hasn't arrived.  If the US had gotten knocked out, I would've taken a bath to the tune of about $5000.  Keep buying me time, Team USA!  Otherwise that's my kids' college fund down the tubes.

[image via ESPN]

You thought I was joking around yesterday when I said I was only posting vuvuzela-related stuff until the USA was booted from the World Cup?

Well, the Internet will NEVER run out of humorous vuvuzela images.  Never!

Say it will!  I dare ya!  I double dare ya!

Ha.  "Vuvuzela Hero."  That's just silly.

[via The Daily What]

What's that??  You want more vuvuzela-related humor???

Well I got your funny vuvuzela images right here!

Can you tell that instead of doing work I'm streaming World Cup soccer and then desperately attempting to throw up some random images at the last minute?

Well here's the deal: I'm going to keep posting vuvuzela stuff until the United States is eliminated from World Cup.  That's how I show my support of this country!

I don't vote; I'm not registered for jury duty; I don't pay taxes.  I feel obligated to at least do something…

[via The Daily What]

There is nothing funny about this image.

Renowned footballer and current Argentine manager Diego Maradona had a serious cocaine problem, alright?  He's been battling drug addiction for decades.

So though we might laugh at the fact that the vuvuzela is perfectly designed to send a massive pile of blow directly up the nose of a former drug addict, we really shouldn't be spreading this image…

We don't want him to get any ideas.  He's always just one vuvuzela and a giant pile of Argentinian marching powder away from a relapse.

[via Reddit]

More than anything else, this year's World Cup has introduced the planet to the "vuvuzela" — the "stadium horn" responsible for every match sounding like it's under siege by a swarm of angry bees.

If you've never heard of a vuvuzela, either (1) you've not watched any of the World Cup, or (2) while watching the World Cup, you asked the question, "What the hell is that noise?!" and someone replied, "I think that's just how soccer sounds."

No, that's only how soccer sounds in South Africa.  In other countries, like England and Ireland where drinking is more prominent, fans don't need a plastic device to be that loud and annoying.

According to Wikipedia, vuvuzelas have even more benefits than just cheering on your team, or your opponent, or your drunkenness: "They have been associated with noise-induced permanent hearing loss, cited as a possible safety risk when spectators cannot hear evacuation announcements, and potentially spread colds and flu viruses."  And that doesn't even include the number of vuvuzela-related fatalities after a fan murders the person next to him for blowing a vuvuzela in his ear for 90 minutes plus stoppage time.

[image via Reddit via The Daily What]

The World Cup 2010 starts today!  Right now actually!!  Are you excited?

The opening match is South Africa vs. Mexico.  Does it get any better than that?  South Africa vs. Mexico?!  Two teams who have placed in a combined zero World Cups?!?  Huh??  Huh???  What a kickoff!

Now you can be all ethnocentric and say that World Cup sucks because it's soccer and soccer is gay.  But I'll tell you what, there is nothing gay about when your team scores that big goal and all 11 guys pile on top of each other in celebration.

And all your favorite players will be there!  Iker Casillas, Fernando Torres, Steven Pienaar, even Robin van Persie!  Yes!  Robin van Persie will be there!

I can sense the excitement in the air!  Assuming you got your wagers in on time.