television

He's had the soul patch since he was 9.

[via Izismile]

Posted without comment.

[via Izismile]

So awkward when your husband's black and you pop out a blonde.

…See what I did there?

[via Imgur]

I feel like she should meet last night's Web Redemption. Something tells me they'd hit it off.

[via Barstool]

Does this guy in an oatmeal sweater photobomb the shit out of British news, or does this guy in an oatmeal sweater photobomb the shit out of British news.

More here. Look, but don't touch. I got dibs.

[via The Chive]

In her defense, after she saw the snake she caught her husband in bed with the maid and THEN burned down the house.

[via Fail Nation]

The White House took down two of our petitions! Not. Cool.

Apparently the government wants to think they're getting a better deal on an ice cream maker than their neighbor, even though it's obvious their neighbor ALSO got a 20% off coupon, because they took down our Bed, Bath & Beyond proposal.

Then they saw the Dave Chappelle petition, but were still so mad about the coupons! So that one is down too. You can't get between somebody and their savings.

Turns out it's really hard to change America. But you can still sign these other petitions:

1. Pass a law to unite the Dakotas into one state.

2. Get rid of all coins. And $10's and $50's. And butterscotch hard candies. 

3. Grant US citizenship to any Mexican who can make a killer fish taco. 

…Except cunnilingus.

[via Uber Humor]

He doesn't always pick his nose but when he does, he makes sure we're live.

[via Izismile]

To summarize: Ian the octopus man is an octopus man (but is NOT your boyfriend), cat people are highly sexual, that British dude is not convinced, you have a cat grandmother, you have sex with aliens at bus stops (where else would you do it, honestly), briefcase game time, you're friends with The Greys, the British dude makes a bad Grey's Anatomy joke.

[via Barstool]