the sopranos

You wouldn't be thrilled if you came out of your mom looking like James Gandolfini either.

[via Izismile]

This is a clip from a 2001 episode of "The Sopranos" featuring none other than our Lady of Gaga.

"Wow!" you say, "So she can act too?"

Well, not "act" as much as "get two to three seconds of screen time."

But it wasn't her first go-round trying to get famous without the use of hideous costuming, oh no. She was on MTV's "Boiling Points" back in the day looking like the normal, all-American girl she tries so hard not to be.

Apparently, when you don't wear cold cuts splayed across your chest you don't get that much attention.

At least she's learned from it.

via Blame It On The Voices

1. I want to know as much information as possible.
2. I don?t want to devote any time to that goal.

On the internet, those two conflicting ideals find harmony in recaps, mash-ups and spoilers. Urlesque put together a list of wrap-up videos, calling it a wrap-up of wrap-ups. Theoretically, you could watch all of these cliff notes and know everything there is to know! Here?s what they cover:

• Music
• Visual effects
• The Big Lebowski
• The 2008 presidential race
• Battlestar Galactica
• The Sopranos
• Church History
• Western Philosophy
• First-person shooters
• Space travel
• Modern warfare
• The past decade
• Inspirational speeches

There are a lot of knowledge gaps in there. This must be what it?s like to be home-schooled.

But the other major flaw: all of these videos add up to about an hour?s worth of material! All that time just to get a half-assed perspective on a dozen random aspects of American culture? That?s why I?d like to do a wrap-up of their wrap-up of wrap-ups:

Billie Jean is the most over-played song ever. CGI always looked like garbage. The Big Lebowski is mostly f-bombs. Obama won. (Battlestar Galactica isn?t worth spending a sentence on.) There are too many characters in The Sopranos. …and in Church History. Plato is the only philosopher ever. ?They may take our lives, but they may never take our freedom."

There you go.  I just boiled the history of civilization down to one paragraph.