tube

How To Use An Inner Tube Romantically When You're On Your Own:

1) Flatten inner tube

2) Cut hole in it (size of Oreo)

3) Go to Marine Supply Office… Depot. Buy rubber hosing, put around the hole of the inner tube. It will look like Janice Dickinson's lips.

4) Find pleasure by yourself in a beautiful body of water (trees, birds chirping, doves honking)

5) Insert your pleasure body parts into the hole

6) Push and pull inner tube

7) Smile, act like nothing's happening

8) Send Christmas card to inner tube company.

[via Barstool]

A number of blogs have featured the above video entitled "Worlds Greatest Golf Shot" [sic].

I realize these trick shot videos are a "thing" on college campuses right now, but, guys, really?

Once the ball goes through a tube or a gutter, it's no longer a "shot."  The tube just points the ball where to go.  I'd be more surprised if the ball didn't go in, because that would mean you didn't have the manual dexterity to point a tube in the right direction.  That's the point of a tube: To help something get where you want it to go.

Are these kids amazed when they turn on the faucet and water comes out?  Obviously, the efficiency of tubes excites them.

When taking a shower, do they go: "AH!  WATER IS BEING POURED OVER ME!  OH MY GOD!!  AH HA HA!!!!"

What these guys need is a tube to point them towards some ladies.